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brideshead+revisited-第章

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    'And that's another thing。 I don't know what allowance my uncle makes you; but I don't mind betting you're spending double。 All this;' he said; including in a wide sweep of his hand the evidence of profligacy about him。 It was true; my room had cast its austere winter garments; and; by not very slow stages; assumed a richer wardrobe。 'Is that paid for?' (the box of a hundred cabinet Partagas on the sideboard) 'or those?' (a dozen frivolous; new books on the table) 'or those?' (a Lalique decanter and glasses) 'or that peculiarly noisome object?' (a human skull lately purchased from the School of Medicine; which; resting in a bowl of roses; formed; at the moment; the chief decoration of my table。 It bore the motto 'Et in Arcadia ego' inscribed on its forehead。)
    'Yes;' I said; glad to be clear of one charge。 'I had to pay cash for the skull。'
    'You can't be doing any work。 Not that that matters; particularly if you're making something of your career elsewhere … but are you? Have you spoken at the Union or at any of the clubs? Are you connected with any of the magazines? Are you even making a position in the O。U。D。S。? And your clothes!' continued my cousin。 'When you came up I remember advising you to dress as you would in a country house。 Your present get…up seems an unhappy promise between the correct wear for a theatrical party at Maidenhead and a glee…singing petition in a garden suburb。
    'And drink … no one minds a man getting tight once or twice a term。 In fact; he ought to; on certain occasions。 But I hear you're constantly seen drunk in the middle of the afternoon。'
    He paused; his duty discharged。 Already the perplexities of the examination school were beginning to reassert themselves in his mind。
    'I'm sorry; Jasper;' I said。 'I know it must be embarrassing for you; but I happen to like this bad set。 I like getting drunk at luncheon; and though I haven't yet spent quite double my allowance; I undoubtedly shall before the end of term。 I usually have a glass of champagne about this time。 Will you join me?'
    So my cousin Jasper despaired and; I learned later; wrote to his father on the subject of my excesses who; in his turn; wrote to my father; who took no action or particular thought in the matter; partly because he had disliked my uncle for nearly sixty years and partly because; as Jasper had said; he lived in his own world now; since my mother's death。
    Thus; in broad outline; Jasper sketched the more prominent features of my first year; some detail may be added on the same scale。
     I had mitted myself earlier to spend the Easter vacation with Collins and; though I would have broken my word without punction and left my former friend friendless; had Sebastian made a sign; no sign was made; accordingly Collins and I spent several economical and instructive weeks together in Ravenna。 A bleak wind blew from the Adriatic among those mighty tombs。 In an hotel bedroom designed for a warmer season; I wrote long letters to Sebastian and called daily at the post: office for his answers。 There were two; each from a different address; neither giving any plain news of himself; for he wrote in a style of remote fantasy … 。。。'Mummy and two attendant poets have three bad colds in the head; so I have e here。 It is the feast of S。 Nichodemus of Thyatira; who was martyred by having goatskin nailed to his pate; and is accordingly the patron of bald heads。 Tell Collins; who I am sure will be bald before us。 There are too many people here; but one; praise heaven! Has an ear trumpet; and that keeps me in good humour。 And now I must try to catch a fish。 It is too far to send it to you so I will keep the backbone。。。' … which left me fretful。 Collins made notes for a little thesis pointing out the inferiority of the original mosaics to their photographs。 Here was planted the seed of what became his life's harvest。 When; many years later; there appeared the first massive volume of his still unfinished work on Byzantine Art; I was touched to find among two pages of polite; preliminary acknowledgements of debt; my own name: '。。。to Charles Ryder; with the aid of whose all…seeing yes I first saw the Mausoleum of Galla Placidia and San Vitale。。。'
    I sometimes wonder whether; had it not been for Sebastian; I might have trodden the same path as Collins round the cultural water…wheel。 My father in his youth sat for All Souls and; in a year of hot petition; failed; other successes and honours came his way later; but that early failure impressed itself on him; and through him on me; so that I came up with an ill…considered sense that there lay the proper and natural goal of the life of reason。 I; too; should doubtless have failed; but; having failed; I might perhaps have slipped into a less august academic life elsewhere。 It is conceivable; but not; I believe; likely; for the hot spring of anarchy rose from the depths where was no solid earth; and burst into the sunlight … a rainbow in its cooling vapours … with a power the rocks could not repress。
    In the event; that Easter vacation formed a short stretch of level road in the precipitous descent of which Jasper warned me。 Descent or ascent? It seems to me that I grew younger daily with each adult habit that I acquired。 I had lived a lonely childhood and a boyhood; straitened by war and overshadowed by bereavement; to the hard bachelordom of English adolescence; the premature dignity and authority of the school system; I had added; a sad and grim strain of my own。 Now; that summer term with Sebastian; it seemed as though I was being given a brief spell of what I had never known; a happy childhood; and though its toys were silk shirts and liqueurs and cigars and its naughtiness high in the catalogue of grave sins; there was something of nursery freshness about us that fell little short of the joy of innocence。 At the end of the term I took my first schools; it was necessary to pass; if I was to remain at Oxford and pass I did; after a week in which I forbade Sebastian my rooms and sat up to a late hour; with iced black; coffee and charcoal biscuits; cramming myself with the neglected texts。 I remember no syllable of them now; but the other; more ancient lore which I acquired that term will be with me in one shape or another to my last hour。
     'I like this bad set and I like getting drunk at luncheon'; that was enough then。 Is more needed now?
    Looking back; now; after twenty years; there is little I would have left undone or done otherwise。 I could match my cousin Jasper's game…cock maturity with a sturdier fowl。 I could tell him that all the wickedness of that time was like the spirit they mix with the pure grape of the Douro; heady stuff full of dark ingredients; it at once enriched and retarded the whole process of adolescence as the spirit checks the fermentation of the wine; renders it undrinkable; so; that it must lie in the dark year in; year out; until it is brought up at last fit for the table。
    I could tell him; too; that to know and love one other; human being is the root of all wisdom。 But I felt no need for these sophistries as I sat before my cousin; saw him; freed from his inconclusive struggle with Pindar; in his dark grey suit; his white 
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