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butistherenotanotherofmoreimportance鈥斺�攖hatwhichconcernsthehealthofthesoul?amisosureofhavingneglectednomeansofpreservingthatduringtheyearwhichisnowending?havei;asoneofgodssoldiersuponearth;keptmycourageandmyarmsefficient?shallibereadyforthegreatreviewofsoulswhichmustpassbeforehimwhoisinthedarkvalleyofjehoshaphat?
darestthouexaminethyself;omysoul!andseehowoftenthouhasterred?
first;thouhasterredthroughpride!forihavenotdulyvaluedthelowly。ihavedrunktoodeeplyoftheintoxicatingwinesofgenius;andhavefoundnorelishinpurewater。ihavedisdainedthosewordswhichhadnootherbeautythantheirsincerity;ihaveceasedtolovemensolelybecausetheyaremen鈥斺�攊havelovedthemfortheirendowments;ihavecontractedtheworldwithinthenarrowpassofapantheon;andmysympathyhasbeenawakenedbyadmirationonly。thevulgarcrowd;whichioughttohavefollowedwithafriendlyeyebecauseitisposedofmybrothersinhopeorgrief;ihaveletpassbywithasmuchindifferenceasifitwereaflockofsheep。iamindignantwithhimwhorollsinrichesanddespisesthemanpoorinworldlywealth;andyet;vainofmytriflingknowledge;idespisehimwhoispoorinmind鈥斺�攊scornthepovertyofintellectasothersdothatofdress;itakecreditforagiftwhichididnotbestowonmyself;andturnthefavoroffortuneintoaweaponwithwhichtoattackothers。
ah!if;intheworstdaysofrevolutions;ignorancehasrevoltedandraisedacryofhatredagainstgenius;thefaultisnotaloneintheenviousmaliceofignorance;butesinpart;too;fromthecontemptuousprideofknowledge。
alas!ihavetoopletelyforgottenthefableofthetwosonsofthemagicianofbagdad。
oneofthem;struckbyanirrevocabledecreeofdestiny;wasbornblind;whiletheotherenjoyedallthedelightsofsight。thelatter;proudofhisownadvantages;laughedathisbrothersblindness;anddisdainedhimasapanion。onemorningtheblindboywishedtogooutwithhim。
〃towhatpurpose;〃saidhe;〃sincethegodshaveputnothinginmonbetweenus?formecreationisastage;whereathousandcharmingscenesandwonderfulactorsappearinsuccession;foryouitisonlyanobscureabyss;atthebottomofwhichyouheartheconfusedmurmurofaninvisibleworldntinuethenaloneinyourdarkness;andleavethepleasuresoflighttothoseuponwhomtheday…starshines。〃
withthesewordshewentaway;andhisbrother;leftalone;begantocrybitterly。hisfather;whoheardhim;immediatelyrantohim;andtriedtoconsolehimbypromisingtogivehimwhateverhedesired。
〃canyougivemesight?〃askedthechild。
〃fatedoesnotpermitit;〃saidthemagician。
〃then;〃criedtheblindboy;eagerly;〃iaskyoutoputoutthesun!〃
whoknowswhethermypridehasnotprovokedthesamewishonthepartofsomeoneofmybrotherswhodoesnotsee?
buthowmuchoftenerhaveierredthroughlevityandwantofthought!
howmanyresolutionshaveitakenatrandom!howmanyjudgmentshaveipronouncedforthesakeofawitticism!howmanymischiefshaveinotdonewithoutanysenseofmyresponsibility!thegreaterpartofmenharmoneanotherforthesakeofdoingsomething。welaughatthehonorofone;andpromisethereputationofanother;likeanidlemanwhosauntersalongahedgerow;breakingtheyoungbranchesanddestroyingthemostbeautifulflowers。
and;nevertheless;itisbythisverythoughtlessnessthatthefameofsomemeniscreated。itrisesgradually;likeoneofthosemysteriousmoundsinbarbarouscountries;towhichastoneisaddedbyeverypasserby;eachonebringssomethingatrandom;andaddsitashepasses;withoutbeingablehimselftoseewhetherheisraisingapedestaloragibbet。whowilldarelookbehindhim;toseehisrashjudgmentshelduptheretoview?
sometimeagoiwaswalkingalongtheedgeofthegreenmoundonwhichthemontmartretelegraphstands。belowme;alongoneofthezigzagpathswhichwindupthehill;amanandagirlwereingup;andarrestedmyattention。themanworeashaggycoat;whichgavehimsomeresemblancetoawildbeast;andheheldathickstickinhishand;withwhichhedescribedvariousstrangefiguresintheair。hespokeveryloud;andinavoicewhichseemedtomeconvulsedwithpassion。heraisedhiseyeseverynowandthenwithanexpressionofsavageharshness;anditappearedtomethathewasreproachingandthreateningthegirl;andthatshewaslisteningtohimwithasubmissivenesswhichtouchedmyheart。
twoorthreetimessheventuredafewwords;doubtlessintheattempttojustifyherself;butthemaninthegreatcoatbeganagainimmediatelywithhisloudandangryvoice;hissavagelooks;andhisthreateningevolutionsintheair。ifollowedhimwithmyeyes;vainlyendeavoringtocatchawordashepassed;untilhedisappearedbehindthehill。
ihadevidentlyjustseenoneofthosedomestictyrantswhosesullentempersareexcitedbythepatienceoftheirvictims;andwho;thoughtheyhavethepowertobeethebeneficentgodsofafamily;chooserathertobetheirtormentors。
icursedtheunknownsavageinmyheart;andifeltindignantthatthesecrimesagainstthesacredpeaceofhomecouldnotbepunishedastheydeserve;wheniheardhisvoiceapproachingnearer。hehadturnedthepath;andsoonappearedbeforemeatthetopoftheslope。
thefirstglance;andhisfirstwords;explainedeverythingtome:inplaceofwhatihadtakenforthefurioustonesandterriblelooksofanangryman;andtheattitudeofafrightenedvictim;ihadbeforemeonlyanhonestcitizen;whosquintedandstuttered;butwhowasexplainingthemanagementofsilkwormstohisattentivedaughter。
iturnedhomeward;smilingatmymistake;butbeforeireachedmyfaubourgisawacrowdrunning;iheardcallsforhelp;andeveryfingerpointedinthesamedirectiontoadistantcolumnofflame。
amanufactoryhadtakenfire;andeverybodywasrushingforwardtoassistinextinguishingit。
ihesitated。nightwasingon;ifelttired;afavoritebookwasawaitingme;ithoughttherewouldbenowantofhelp;andiwentonmyway。
justbeforeihaderredfromwantofconsideration;nowitwasfromselfishnessandcowardice。
butwhat!haveinotonathousandotheroccasionsforgottenthedutieswhichbindustoourfellowmen?isthisthefirsttimeihaveavoidedpayingsocietywhatioweit?haveinotalwaysbehavedtomypanionswithinjustice;andlikethelion?haveinotclaimedsuccessivelyeveryshare?ifanyoneissoill…advisedastoaskmetoreturnsomelittleportion;igetprovoked;iamangry;itrytoescapefromitbyeverymeans。howmanytimes;whenihaveperceivedabeggarsittinghuddledupattheendofthestreet;haveinotgoneoutofmyway;forfearthatpassionwouldimpoverishmebyforcingmetobecharitable!howoftenhaveidoubtedthemisfortunesofothers;thatimightwithjusticehardenmyheartagainstthem。
withwhatsatisfactionhaveisometimesverifiedthevicesofthepoorman;inordertoshowthathismiseryisthepunishmenthedeserves!
oh!letusnotgofarther鈥斺�攍etusnotgofarther!iinterruptedthedoctorsexamination;buthowmuchsadderisthisone!wepitythediseasesofthebody;weshudderatthoseofthesoul。
iwashappilydisturbedinmyreveriebymyneighbor;theoldsoldier。
nowithinkofit;iseemalwaystohaveseen;duringmyfever;thefigureofthisgoodoldman;sometimesleaningagainstmybed;andsometimessittingathistable;surroundedbyhissheetsofpasteboard。
hehasjusteinwithhisglue…pot;hisquireofgreenpaper;andhisgreatscissors。icalledhimbyhisname;heutteredajoyfulexclamation;andcamenearme。
〃well!sothebulletisfoundagain!〃criedhe;takingmytwohandsintothemaimedonewhichwaslefthim;〃ithasnotbeenwithouttrouble;icantellyou;thecampaignhasbeenlongenoughtowintwoclaspsin。
ihaveseennofewfellowswiththefeverbatterwindmillsduringmyhospitaldays:atleipsic;ihadaneighborwhofanciedachimneywasonfireinhisstomach;andwhowasalwayscallingforthefire…engines;butthethirddayitallwentoutofitself。butwithyouithaslastedtwenty…eightdays鈥斺�攁slongasoneofthelittlecorporalscampaigns。〃
〃iamnotmistakenthen;youwerenearme?〃
〃well!ihadonlytocrossthepassage。thislefthandhasnotmadeyouabadnur