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“Don’t I know it！ You didn’t leave the gun anywhere obvious； did you？”
“Nope。 I figured this might be in’ on soon。”
“That’s something； at least。”
“It’s okay；” I lied in a whisper。 “It’s okay。” I knew even a fool would hear the false note in my voice；
and Jamie was not a fool。
“He won’t hurt you；” Jamie said thickly； struggling against the tears I could see in his eyes。 “I won’t let
him。”
“Shh；” I murmured。
I was appalled—I could feel that my face was fixed in lines of horror。 Jared was right—howcould Jeb
have let this happen？ If they’d killed me the first day here； before Jamie had ever seen me… Or that first
week； while Jared kept me isolated from everyone； before Jamie and I had bee friends… Or if I had
just kept my mouth shut about Melanie… It was too late for all that。 My arms tightened around the child。
Melanie was just as aghast。My poor baby。
Itoldyou it was a bad idea to tell him everything； I reminded her。
What will it do to him now； when we die？
It’s going to be terrible。 He’ll be traumatized and scarred and devastated —
Melanie interrupted me。Enough。 I know； I know。 But what can we do？
Not die； I suppose。
Melanie and I thought about the likelihood of our survival and felt despair。
Ian thumped Jamie on the back—I could feel the motion reverberate through both our bodies。
“Don’t agonize over it； kid；” he said。 “You’re not in this alone。”
“They’re just shocked； that’s all。” I recognized Trudy’s alto voice behind me。 “Once we get a chance to
explain； they’ll see reason。”
“See reason？ Kyle？” someone hissed almost unintelligibly。
“We knew this was ing；” Jeb muttered。 “Just got to weather it。 Storms pass。”
“Maybe you ought to find that gun；” Lily suggested calmly。 “Tonight might be a long one。 Wanda can
stay with Heidi and me —”
“I think it might be better to keep her somewhere else；” Ian disagreed。 “Maybe in the southern tunnels？
I’ll keep an eye on her。 Jeb； wanna lend me a hand？”
“They wouldn’t look for her with me。” Walter’s offer was just a whisper。
“No；” I finally managed to choke out。 “No。 That’s not right。 You shouldn’t fight with each other。 You all
belong here。 You belong together。 Not fighting； not because of me。”
I pulled Jamie’s arms from around my waist； holding his wrists when he tried to stop me。
“I just need a minute to myself；” I told him； ignoring all the stares I could feel on my face。 “I need to be
alone。” I turned my head to find Jeb。 “And you should have a chance to discuss this without me listening。
It’s not fair—having to discuss strategy in front of the enemy。”
“Now； don’t be like that；” Jeb said。
“Let me have some time to think； Jeb。”
I stepped away from Jamie； dropping his hands。 A hand fell on my shoulder； and I cringed。
It was just Ian。 “It’s not a good idea for you to be wandering around by yourself。”
I leaned toward him and tried to pitch my voice so low that Jamie wouldn’t hear me clearly。 “Why
prolong the inevitable？ Will it get easier or harder for him？”
I thought I knew the answer to my last question。 I ducked under Ian’s hand and broke into a run；
sprinting for the exit。
“Wanda！” Jamie called after me。
Someone quickly shushed him。 There were no footsteps behind me。 They must have seen the wisdom of
letting me go。
The hall was dark and deserted。 If I was lucky； I’d be able to cut around the edge of the big garden
plaza in the dark with no one the wiser。
In all my time here； the one thing I’d never found was the way out。 It seemed as if I’d been down every
tunnel time and again； and I’d never seen an opening I hadn’t eventually explored in search of one thing
or another。 I thought about it now as I crept through the deepest shadowed corners of the big cave。
Where could the exit be？ And I thought about this： if I could figure that puzzle out； would I be able to
leave？
I couldn’t think of anything worth leaving for—certainly not the desert waiting outside； but also not the
Seeker； not the Healer； not my forter； not my life before； which had left such a shallow impression
on me。 Everything that really mattered was with me here。 Jamie。 Though he would kill me； Jared。 I
couldn’t imagine walking away from either of them。
And Jeb。 Ian。 I had friends now。 Doc； Trudy； Lily； Wes； Walter； Heath。 Strange humans who could
overlook what I was and see something they didn’t have to kill。 Maybe it was just curiosity； but
regardless of that； they were willing to side with me against the rest of their tight…knit family of survivors。 I
shook my head in wonder as I traced the rough rock with my hands。
I could hear others in the cavern； on the far side from me。 I didn’t pause； they could not see me here；
and I’d just found the crevice I was looking for。
CHAPTER 27
Undecided
Ifelt my way back to my prison hole。
It had been weeks and weeks since I’d been down this particular corridor； I hadn’t been back since the
morning after Jared had left and Jeb had set me free。 It seemed to me that while I lived and Jared was in
the caves； this must be where I belonged。
There was no dim light to greet me now。 I was fairly sure I was in the last leg—the turns and twists were
still vaguely familiar。 I let my left hand drag against the wall as low as I could reach； feeling for the
opening as I crept forward。 I wasn’t decided on crawling backinside the cramped hole； but at least it
would give me a reference point； letting me know that I was where I meant to be。
As it happened； I didn’t have the option of inhabiting my cell again。
In the same moment that my fingers brushed the rough edge at the top of the hole； my foot hit an
obstacle and I stumbled； falling to my knees。 I threw my hands out to catch myself； and they landed with
a crunch and a crackle； breaking through something that wasn’t rock and didn’t belong here。
The sound startled me； the unexpected object frightened me。 Perhaps I’d made a wrong turn and wasn’t
anywhere near my hole。 Perhaps I was in someone’s living space。 I ran through the memory of my recent
journey in my head； wondering how I could have gotten so turned about。 Meanwhile； I listened for some
reaction to my crashing fall； holding absolutely still in the darkness。
There was nothing—no reaction； no sound。 It was only dark and stuffy and humid； as it always was； and
so silent that I knew I must be alone。
Carefully； trying to make as little noise as possible； I took stock of my surroundings。
My hands were stuck in something。 I pulled them free； tracing the contours of what felt like a cardboard
box—a cardboard box with a sheet of thin； crackly plastic on top that my hands had fallen through。 I felt
around inside the box and found a layer of more crackly plastic—small rectangles that made a lot of
noise when I handled them。 I retreated quickly； afraid of drawing attention to myself。
I remembered that I’d thought I’d found the top of the hole。 I searched to my left and found more stacks
of cardboard squares on that